My stupid keyboard is screwed up. Sigh...
I work tomorrow. I had to take Jackie to the ER Thursday so I had to make it up. I really cannot afford to be of work.
Jackie's asthma flared considerably this week. I called her docter..asking to get a slot..but he was not there so I was told to take her to the ER again. It felt great to hold an insurance card in my hand..there is no way to know what it would cost without insurance.
They ran a lot of tests on her. She does not have pneumonia or bronchitis..or a UTI..or a sinus infection. Basically..her symptoms are just that..symptoms of asthma.
Right now she is on oral steroids and albuterol for breathing treatments. She missed two days of school so I got the customary threatening letter from the school. I had to call to straighten that out. What a pain.
I have been feeling irritable and out of sorts and sort of apathetic about everything. Which translates to "I don't give a damn"....it feels as if I have so much on my plate right now and things are SO overwhelming. I am not being very proactive at all.
I talked to my friend Brandy because it feels to me like it's going to take FOREVER to build things back up with Lisa. She said that is normal.But what's bugging me is that neither of us are really able to dedicate much time or energy to it...which is sad. I sort of feel things will never be the same. Oh..we might get close again..but something is missing and will probably not return.
I am endlessly annoyed by so much right now..my nerves are wound tight. I keep snapping at David and Jackie hoping they'll get the drift and leave me alone. There is nowhere to run right at this moment and if I could I'd just disappear into another reality where life would just be a bit easier. There is no "EASY" button.
I had a wedding dream and I am a bit sad because shit..did I NOT just lose a family member 9 months ago? Every single freaking time I have a wedding dream..someone dies within a few days. Since it was David....I know it's going to be someone close in my family. :(
I feel so disconnected from everything...so irritated..annoyed..
These two will be the death of me with their bickering. I swear..there's a competition..and I am the freaking ref.
The only escape is sleep......and sleep is where I find out someone is going to die.
Other than that..I'm just ducky!
7:25 pm - January 20, 2007
Recent entries:
What you missed - January 16, 2012
%%older_entries%%From hell - October 19, 2010
%%older_entries%%a rant from a few weeks ago - August 17, 2010
%%older_entries%%Tired - June 20, 2010
%%older_entries%%A beautiful lie - March 11, 2010
%%older_entries%%
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