I am well today. I have temporarily dodged a bullet in regards to that thing I did years ago. It will eventually come to light but not anytime in the future. I will be truthful when that time comes, no matter what the consequence.
Thank you all for the support, love and well-wishes.
I saw my therapist today. We talked about what I did and she was pretty much amazed that I had so much guilt. She said that she personally felt I was blowing it out of proportion. But also, if you know me, you know my life has been about the worst thing always happening, and you get why I think the way I do.
She told me she forgave me for what I did about 5 seconds after I told her about it. That was healing for me. She also told me she wants me to work on forgiving myself.
That�s a tall order.
But I�m going to do that.
We are our own worst critics, no?
We also talked about the sexual abuse I suffered at the hands of my uncle. It is so hard to talk about. But I did nothing wrong. He was an adult and I was a child. I knew no better. I cannot say the same for my uncle.
She gave me a book to read. It�s called, �The Courage to Heal� by Ellen Bass and Laura Davis. She thinks it might be instrumental in getting me on the road to healing.
I�m going to buy a computer in the next few paydays. I think it�s time to get one so I can start taking on-line classes. I need to go back to school. I have the GI Bill, so I really don�t have an excuse not to.
Also, Jackie needs it for school.
Chatting with Lisa and you all on instant messenger wouldn�t be so bad either.
1:48 pm - January 19, 2006
Recent entries:
What you missed - January 16, 2012
%%older_entries%%From hell - October 19, 2010
%%older_entries%%a rant from a few weeks ago - August 17, 2010
%%older_entries%%Tired - June 20, 2010
%%older_entries%%A beautiful lie - March 11, 2010
%%older_entries%%
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