****************************************These are my own thoughts, so if you don't agree, you can skip your happy butt to someone else's page..******
I'm scared of what this city will be like if the law really does pass that people over the age of 23 can carry concealed weapons legally.
St. Louis, home of the Crips, Bloods, and other hoodlums, is already one of the most dangerous cities in the US. To think about anybody, any moron, any madman, alchoholic, drug user...being able to carry a gun..that scares me.
More policemen will die. Because your average Joe just might lose it one day on the expressway..and use the gun he carries for protection against the law enforcement people.
It can and will happen.
The potential passage of the gun law has also prompted me to ponder the what-if's about Rodn*ey Lin*coln. Now that he's submitted DNA, what if they find his DNA in a cold case? This is likely, since he killed in 1974. He then, 8 years later, attempted to viciously kill me and my four year old sister, and then murdered our mother. The likelyhood is that we're not his only victims. He's just a sneaky bastard.
Surely then, he will recieve the death penalty, to which I say "Hallelujah!". I say that because maybe, just maybe, if they kill his ass, I might get some sleep. It would be nice to have one night where I didn't have this sinking feeling of doom. Wondering if this will be the night someone tries to break into my house, or rape me, or hurt me and my child.
It would be nice to know that he'll never get the chance to come back and "finish the job" as he promised.
It would be nice to know that my tax dollars wouldn't be sustaining my mom's murderer and my attacker/rapist in prison.
It would be nice to finally move on. This jerk has 9 lives. I swear, I've never heard of a child predator/rapist/murderer living so long in prison without some serious butt-whooping. During the trial, when there was a lot of publicity, they beat him up so bad that he couldn't make his court appearances. Prisoners unite. Rodn*ey Lin*coln is in Jefferson County Correctional Center and he thinks he is going to get out.
I know they said he has it bad, but you know, all the suffering he could ever do would never match what my mom went through, what my family endured, what I lost, what I will never regain, and most of all, would never make up for the physical problems I have today.
Thanks to Rodn*ey I have problems with; depression, sleep apnea, post-traumatic stress syndrome, social phobia, anxiety, sleep terrors, insomnia, and I occasionally space out.
Not to mention: I don't trust people, I stay away from manly men, and I'm vigilant about protecting my daughter.
I'd like to relax.
I can't.
The other question though is: if he recieved the death penalty by electric chair (which is a hundred times more humane than what we went through), would I push the button? Yes, I would. Would I feel any better? Not really. Him dying is not going to bring my mother and my innocence back. It's not going to make my sister well...but it would give me some closure.
I can't just forgive and forget. That's something people say when they don't want you to hurt anymore or they think you feel sorry for yourself.
Sorry, I'm not Jesus, and I'm not perfect. I feel the way I feel because I'm human.
11:48 a.m. - 2003-09-12
Recent entries:
What you missed - January 16, 2012
%%older_entries%%From hell - October 19, 2010
%%older_entries%%a rant from a few weeks ago - August 17, 2010
%%older_entries%%Tired - June 20, 2010
%%older_entries%%A beautiful lie - March 11, 2010
%%older_entries%%
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