"Hey sugar-booger" is all I've said to the Matthew Broderick cutie. He is mighty fine.
The teacher-parent night wasn�t quite the nightmare I worried about. I just pretended this was a business meeting where we both happen to love the client, and hey, it went well. I didn�t have to get stank and neither did ms. Teacher.
The teacher�s fangs didn�t come out at all. And to top it off, Jackie got a good report card, so she gets some free stuff from local merchants.
By the way, no news about the DNA. Crap. Anyday now, while I�m young, would be nice.
Jeez.
I got my credit report from Equifax yesterday. It was not good. I seem to have bounced some checks that were not paid. When? I�m such a space cadet. Well, now that I�m an awake person, I realize just how bad my sleep apnea was. I was literally a walking zombie for the past 8-9 years.
Walking zombie with no regard for financial responsibility.
It�s embarrassing. No wonder people thought I was somewhat of a ditz.
I hate credit reports. I hadn�t seen mine in a while and it was obvious.
There were also a few creditors I�ve never heard of. Also lastly, my little identity thief made a few appearances too. This person has run accounts with Metro East Sanitary District and St. Louis County Library. I keep telling these people my name is not Kurtinya DeBoe and I�ve never lived in East St. Louis, but they keep harassing me. Does Melissa remotely resemble Kurtinya? I don�t think so.
I don�t want to be ignorant, but I guess I�ll have to. Maybe I can send them some threatening letters so they know how annoying it is. Better yet, I can send them some of my junk mail. He he.
So, I thought about my job and how this negative credit activity will affect it. In the next month or so I will have to suffer an interview with the investigators. They are unrelenting and very mean.
They will go through my credit report with a fine-toothed comb. I know this because of the last time they did it too.
It won�t be pretty. I will probably cry. Why? Because I�m nowhere near perfect and I�m very embarrassed about this.
And you know what? When I think about it..I don�t want to work with this kind of responsibility anymore. The kind of responsibility that could land you in jail if you make a job related mistake. The kind where if you pay a bill late you have to explain it. The kind where you can�t socialize with foreign nationals. Are you getting me now? It�s too much stress. I�m feeling very burnt out. I�m tired. I don�t want to come to work and be productive anymore.
Even though it may seem I�m getting upset over nothing..this really is something. This fear is based on a reality, unlike some of my phobias.
This morning, I was getting upset about potentially losing my job over this, and I remembered that a while ago, I developed what I call my �Plan B�. �Plan B� goes something like this:
I start saving money now to move. I work on getting my car paid off early too, so when I move, the biggest bill will be rent.
I start shipping some crap to my cousin�s new home in Leavenworth, Kansas. My dad�s family lives there..and it looks like I will have to live there too. It�s a beautiful place, if you don�t mind tornadoes.
When my lease is up here in March, sign up for another month, but that�s it. Start getting things packed to move.
In April, move to Leavenworth, Kansas, which should be no small feat.
I hate moving.
Once I�m there, I�ll need to enroll at the local University.
I�ll major in criminal justice, and pay for school with my GI Bill.
I�ll be able to get help with raising my daughter and daycare while I work and go to school because my Dad�s family actually helps each other out.
I will be there for at least 4 years, maybe 5, so that I can complete my education. Upon graduation, I will go out and scandalize this country.
I will now be eligible to work with victims of crime in the Justice system. If only all advocates were as big-mouthed as me.
Sigh�if only it would happen as quickly and as cleanly as that.
But at least I know I have a plan B, and if times get bad, I can go to Kansas and have family support while I put myself through school. The fear of not having any place to go is darn scary. But I do have family who will help. It�s just not my family in St. Louis.
I�m sick of my job. Please God; understand I�m grateful for my job in this economy. It�s just that I want to do a job where I make a difference, where I like what I�m doing, where I get paid a reasonable amount of money for a reasonable amount of aggravation.
It�s not too much to ask; that I get a job where at the end of the day I know I�ve helped somebody. I�ll feel good about myself too.
I�m 29, and if I don�t go back to school now, I probably never will. And if it�s anything I learned in this lifetime, is that you should do well in school if possible and go as far in school as you can.
Without a degree, you�re just the Titanic headed toward an iceberg.
Doomed.
11:20 - Friday, Nov. 21, 2003
Recent entries:
What you missed - January 16, 2012
%%older_entries%%From hell - October 19, 2010
%%older_entries%%a rant from a few weeks ago - August 17, 2010
%%older_entries%%Tired - June 20, 2010
%%older_entries%%A beautiful lie - March 11, 2010
%%older_entries%%
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