Thank you God for my �I don�t give a crap� medicine. Is that blasphemy? I hope not.
I am really stressed�and yet, I don�t care.
I have bills to pay�and I�m not in a rush.
My cars a pigsty, my house is in disarray�and yet, I�m not too worried.
A pig named Rod*ney Lin*coln thinks we the people will set him free from prison�and yet, I�m not worried about it much lately.
Thank you Zyprexa. You may only cost $272 dollars for the uninsured, but for me, you�re priceless. Like health, love and friendship.
I�m a bit manic, but at least I�m not depressed.
Sometimes I think I take on too much. Just call me �Ms. Wanna save the World�. I have lots of aspirations for greatness, but lately, I�m not bringing any of them to fruition. I spent a lot of time this weekend chasing my tail. As I told my big sister Mindy, every time I go to do something, I feel like I�m being blocked. At this very moment, I�m sure that she, on my behalf, is consulting her spiritual advisor. This may be a case of �Bad-eye� which I truly believe in. People don�t like you, are jealous of you, wish bad things capon you, can actually create negative kharma and clog up your chakra.
I don�t know what chakra is, but that sounds about right.
I want to update about Bana. I wrote about her last week. She's the skank who'd rather party it up and sleep around than raise her six year old daughter. Remember I was thinking about reporting her because she constantly leaves her six year old alone? This chick doesn't even work and can't be around to mother her child. Well, I never got a chance. Saturday I found out someone had called DFS on her. Was it the school? I'm wondering. I think it was pretty remarkable that the day that DFS is called, the poor little Paige comes home in complete chaos. The poor child got off the school bus in a sleeveless shirt and shorts. It's been really cold recently. Oh, and she had the trademark greasy hair. This makes me wanna smack her mother in her head. I guess she doesn't care that other kids make fun of kids like Paige. Why? Because their parents are morons. Anyway, I'm glad they're watching Bana. It's not fair to that little girl that her mom is selfish.
I spent last week fending off the flu. I felt tired, achy, and woozy. I had headaches, the snots, the cough and the sneezes. I was, as Jackie says, �Miz-able�. People at work asked me to help and I tried, but I just ended up sitting at a PC zoned out. �Sorry� I�d mumble meekly when they�d come over and nothing would be done.
Friday, I had energy in the morning, so I helped tear down some 8 or so pcs and then hooked them up in a different location. I flexed my muscles. It was short-lived, as I was to discover. By 2:00 p.m. Friday afternoon, all I wanted to do was go take a nap. To refresh myself, I took a walk and went outside for a breath of air. While taking this break I surmised that a:) nothing really gets done on Fridays and why should I make waves b:) I wasn�t worth a crap in this state anyway, and c:) I might as well take some more leave and go home, even though I�m 15 hours in the hole.
I hauled butt to my car. I was really hot so I turned on my AC. I was really tired, really weak and kinda irritable. When I got home, I checked my mail. I couldn�t believe it; my child support was there! Thank God!
I felt new, renewed, refreshed. Being broke wears ya down. I mean, I�ve got a good job and I make money, but because the child support is late, there�s not been much room for funny money. I like funny money.
When Jackie got home from school, I greeted her in a black Morticia Adamms wig. I�m going to wear it for Halloween. Jackie hadn�t seen it before, so she was pretty startled.
We decided to go to the mall to get a pretzel. We like Auntie Em�s (or whatever Auntie�s name is). We like the almond ones with caramel dip. I don�t like salt. So this is good, no salt.
I decided I wanted to get my perfume. Dillard�s is way too expensive. JcPenney didn�t have it. But Famous Barr, I knew would have it. It being Gucci Rush. And it would be new, not old. And I�d get samples, because the perfume counter ladies at Famous give you samples because they�re nice.
Last week, when the child support was due (on the 1rst) I spent my birthday money, $80.00 in all, on groceries. So, to make up for this, I bought my absolute favorite perfume. I didn�t buy the small bottle either..I bought the $75.00 bottle. I might be thrifty on some things, but on perfume, no. I like my smell-good. I can make it last a while too.
While the lady was ringing me up, Jackie was over at the Perfume Counter dousing herself with the Gucci Rush from the sample bottle. I don�t think Famous Barr will ever stink. There may have been potential before, but not now.
The nice perfume lady also got me some samples, and I gave her my name and number so that when they get the gift boxes in, she�ll call me, so I can get a discount. Yeeh, haw!
On Saturday, we got up and did laundry. Then, we went to Shoe Carnival to buy some Avia walking shoes. I wear them out about every six months because of my job. I also got Jackie some really cute Adidas shoes, worth $55.00, for $9.50 because there was a sale.
When we got home, I put the shoes on again, but I noticed after a few minutes that the top �cushioned� tongue was cutting into my instep. That hurts! I took them off and decided that I�d take them back the next day. They were the only pair that I liked too. Darn.
Jackie was wearing hers too, but she came in and said that they felt tight. These were a half size larger than what she wears! I�m starting to think this store gets the rejects and maybe we just ought to not buy from them anymore. I put them aside.
I had to get stank with somebody. It was only a matter of time. I hate to get stank because my blood pressure rises and I grit my teeth until they hurt.
Stank Sunday, we get up early. I put the bag of our defective shoes in the trunk. We go to Grandma�s to clean.
Only, I�m still very tired, and I do not clean Grandma�s house. We just eat with her. My Grandma is country, I�ve told ya�ll. She says things that gross me out sometimes. I�m biting into my breakfast burrito when she asks me to �Look at the dog�s butt and see if she� s got any doo-doo on her.� I dropped the breakfast burrito, which was no longer appetizing to me. By the way, I didn�t look at the dog�s butt. That�s just nasty!
After leaving Grandma�s, we head to Shoe Carnival to return the shoes. When Jackie and I are barely in the front door, the manager says, �Would you like an exchange?� Um, gee, Bimbolina, �No, I don�t want an exchange. I�d like a refund please�. I�m standing there holding my receipt while she opens the shoeboxes.
�Oh, no these have been worn, so you get a store credit�. Um, maybe this bitch has a hearing problem. I sighed, �Yeah, I wore them in my living room, but they were obviously defective, and I don�t want any more defective shoes�. If she would�ve looked at my receipt, she�d noticed that I�d bought the shoes at 6 p.m. the night before and it was now noon on the next day. Obviously I hadn�t had them long if at all.
She repeats her mantra, �You can only have a store credit�. I�m getting pissed. �No, you don�t understand, I just bought the shoes. They are unworn. Walking around my living room doesn�t mean I wore them for a 10k. I have my receipt. They are defective. I don�t want any more of your crappy shoes. I want a refund. You will give me one because it is theft if you keep my money�; now my voice is rising quickly.
She says, in her best no nonsense voice, �Ma�am if you don�t lower voice I�m gonna have to ask you to leave!� to which I respond, �No, you will call the police because you are trying to commit theft! You will NOT take my money.�
She asks for my receipt while her crony calls the police. I snort, �What, so you can say I don�t have my receipt? I don�t think so!� She says, �The policy is posted.� And shows me to a small wall on the men�s side of the register that I hadn�t even been on. I pointed this out and added, �It�s not on my receipt either that if you sell me faulty merchandise and I walk in them briefly that you are going to require that I be forced to spend that refund in your store! Most stores understand that defect is the stores problem, not the customers!�
She rolls her eyes. Jackie is watching this whole scene unfold with interest. She hadn�t really seen me this mad before.
I also say, �I�d like to make a general announcement to the store. Ahem! If you are buying shoes here, and you wear them for a nanosecond, and they are defective�.Shoe Carnival will attempt to keep your money. You will be asked to take a store credit. Just thought you�d like to know that they are thieves�.
Now she�s really calling the police. Before, she was just faking it. A few customers put the shoes they are trying on down and they leave. The others ignore us.
Bimbolina is on the phone with the cops. And she is making me sound big and bad. I enjoy it for a minute before I demand to speak with the officer. She hands me the phone.
I explain to the police officer that I work for the Department of Defense and I�m a trustworthy individual. I also explain that I have a receipt for two pairs of shoes that are defective, and that this woman is trying to steal my money. I then explain that it is only necessary for him to come if she�s not intending to refund my money. In short, I let her imagination run wild.
Now, she�s counting out my refund. I put the phone on the counter, having finished speaking to the officer. I say, rather loudly, that I will not be seen in this rather trashy store ever again, and haughtily, I toss my hair and stride out with my daughter.
I explain to my Jackie. �Sometimes you have to be nice. Sometimes, you have to be mean.�
You should use the �mean� sparingly. Nice will usually get you further.
�It�s you and me against the world, kiddo�. She kisses my hand, explaining that she�s sorry the lady embarrassed mommy by treating mommy like she stole the shoes. I love this little girl!
9:31 a.m. - 2003-10-20
Recent entries:
What you missed - January 16, 2012
%%older_entries%%From hell - October 19, 2010
%%older_entries%%a rant from a few weeks ago - August 17, 2010
%%older_entries%%Tired - June 20, 2010
%%older_entries%%A beautiful lie - March 11, 2010
%%older_entries%%
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