Hi. I am feeling fine today, it is a beautiful day.
I still haven't heard about the DNA case..and I hate the questions that loom in my mind. The "what if" game can be so toxic, so I rarely engage in it anymore. But, what if this is never really going to be over? It feels like I'm in the twilight zone.
A few weeks ago I was thinking "what if, by some fluke, el creepo gets out of prison"? I thought, "well maybe justice will be served by him getting run over by a semi when he crosses the street". I want people to see that crime doesn't pay, and that you never really get away with anything. I'd like to think that people in Missouri, including me, would be safe from the likes of him. He is so dangerous, ya'll don't even know. I'm sure you have an idea from my "that house in the alley" entry, but trust me when I say that I told you just a bit. Not the whole thing. Because that night was a Stephen King nightmare come to fruition.
I didn't tell you about the indignities. I didn't mention a lot of things. He just humiliated me on so many levels....
I just want him to pay. Forever. Infinitely. Totally.
I think by me being mad, that it gives me power. I have the right to be mad because it wasn't me that screwed up someone else's life. I didn't hurt anyone. He did.
I think by also seeing my choices and way of life since then, I am owning my life. It also gives me power to take responsibility for my mental health and my choices.
I'm not really a victim anymore. Just a scarred soul and still living.
I just want to know what the hell is going on, and I think that the Circuit Attorney should be putting a stilletto heel up the butt of one of those labworkers. The labworker who is reading a book and eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich instead of doing the lab work. Someone should be doing it. And she should be giving them hell. Go Jennifer! Go kick some butt.
On my behalf please. My family is hurting and waiting and agonizing over this....help them. I can't.
11:31 a.m. - 2003-10-07
Recent entries:
What you missed - January 16, 2012
%%older_entries%%From hell - October 19, 2010
%%older_entries%%a rant from a few weeks ago - August 17, 2010
%%older_entries%%Tired - June 20, 2010
%%older_entries%%A beautiful lie - March 11, 2010
%%older_entries%%
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