I got an email today from the reporter, Ann, from Channel 5 news. She is so sweet for letting me know what�s going on with my story.
I don�t feel sorry for Rodney. He doesn�t remember slaughtering my mother and trying to kill my sis and me because he was high on PCP. Oh, so that makes it okay?
I guess Rodney, AKA Murder and Child Predator, has cried enough that HE is going to be interviewed at the Jefferson City Prison tomorrow. Um, excuse me? Why is anyone going to interview a cold-blooded killer who doesn�t mind slashing a four-year-olds throat to keep from having witnesses? Bastard. If I were faced with him today, I�d kill him. I�d calmly tie his old ass up, fill my bathtub up with water, shove him in there, and then drop a juiced up hair dryer in. And wallah! You have fried criminal crispies just like that. The state has shown him more mercy than I ever would. He�d better be glad he�s in state custody.
I hate him for what he did. I mean, I can try to describe it, but no one will ever really understand what he did to me, what he took from me, and how terrified I am after all these years that someone will try to do something like that to me. Most of all, I think about the horror and helplessness that my mother felt in her final minutes, knowing he probably told her, as she was dying, that he was going to kill her babies.
Well, enough anger for today. Mr. Sweatpants has volunteered to stay the next few days with me. It�s reassuring that he�s worried that I�m a little worked up over this situation, and it�s nice that I won�t have to sleep by myself. However, Mr. Sweatpants doesn�t believe in intimacy. It�s like sleeping with your cousin or something at a sleepover.
I miss feeling close to a man, feeling beautiful and cherished. I miss N. I hope he reads this. I�m really disappointed that I haven�t heard from him in a few weeks. I can be patient but I have to have something to go on.
N. is a really hot, really sexy, really smart, really intriguing guy. It was a risk for me to be interested in a real manly man instead of these scrawny little no backbone types. N. is one muscular, beautiful man! I can also tell he�s emotionally available which I�m not used to; I�m used to having to read someone�s mind. You can�t put a person like him to words. He�s an enigma. Yeah, that kind of gives you an idea.
I hope he comes back someday!
3:04 p.m. - 2003-06-23
Recent entries:
What you missed - January 16, 2012
%%older_entries%%From hell - October 19, 2010
%%older_entries%%a rant from a few weeks ago - August 17, 2010
%%older_entries%%Tired - June 20, 2010
%%older_entries%%A beautiful lie - March 11, 2010
%%older_entries%%
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